What if I end things Now?
Years ago, as I lay on the hospital bed, tired and worn out, I thought of ending things. "Why suffer every day when I can just suffer once and put an end to it forever?" Then I watched my mother sit beside me, silently praying while she think I'm sleeping. She checks my medications and stand long ques to buy me pills doctors prescribe. And I'd think - "Maybe after she passes, I'll end it! She wouldn't bare losing me to my own mind!Not after she fought with me to survive the cancer". The cancer's long gone, and I sit alone at night, unable to sleep. And I'd think, "I should just do it now". I'd think "maybe after I travel the world" If my life was a movie, I'd walk out after the first 30 minutes. But the movie lasts a whole 2 hours. So what if the first 30 minutes were boring, depressing? You have the rest of your movie! If the protagonist kills herself, that would be a terrible ending. So the protagonist waits, b...
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